Redneck Wiccan

It's late night.. nearly 3am and here I am still awake!

Carla went to a Nelson concert tonight, and dammit I"m jealous. I got to listen to part of it then my kids went nuts on me and I had to hang up.

I suppose even though Tami won't let me be part of the street team, I'll just send out flyers and crap on my own behalf. I honestly do not know what this woman has against me.

My husband went tree cutting today.. and I friend chicken for supper.

How interesting huh?

Oh I wrote a hilarious parody to "Garden Party" about Rita-Lee... yeah long story, but carla knows exactly what I'm talking about.

Actually I didn't write it. My husband and sister helped out.. oh if I could only post it!

Guess who's back? Back again--- guess who's back guess who's back guess who's back du nu nu nunnunujnnuj!

Well not much has happened in the way of life! I did give a child up for adoption. I had the c-section may 9th and the woman who adopted is happier than a bug eating shit--- this is supposed to be a secret.. but yet I am posting it for all the world to see... ay yai yai.

We're all happy now that dad's gone. I don't see him much anymore. I like it that way honestly. There's nobody here to make me feel like shit.

Oh I had my tubal done. It better fuckin' work and I better get no more kids outta this.

I found an old 45 of Rick Nelson's travelin' man. Carla is going to be a totally cool person and get it signed for me. How fuckin' cool is that? No not by Rick ya dorks, he's dead.. by Matthew and Gunnar... who honestly has a skeletal look about him now but he's still totally hot, and I'd have my way with him given half the chance.

My kids are growing quicker than shit. Gunnar turned one year old this past first of June and Bubby is going to be Three! WOW! Of course my father did not attend the birthday party...

Speaking of my dad.. Rita.. oh lord there's a story. I can't even go there. Let's just say my father has an alter ego named Rita and let's leave it at that. Use your imagination folks.

Currently seeking employment now... Hope I get a job soon. HOnestly.. I'd stay with my mom forever now. She loves us here, and we love being here now. I spoke with my mothers doctor. She asked me how she was, and of course I told her the truth--- FUCKIN' FABULOUS! Miss EGO now. She's turned out to be "one hot Nana" (Nana is what the children call her). ANd she is lovin' every bit of it. She wears the same size of clothing as I do... Never in her life has she been this skinny. Anyways, my mothers doctor told me to take care of her. Well---honestly my mother can take care of herself.. but I try. I keep the house clean, do her laundry, cook.. blah blah. Im the person my mother enjoys spending time with. We always go shopping together and shit like that. My mother and I are VERY close. Might piss my sister off some, but my sister is a bit of a bore. All she does is sit around, do puzzles, read smut books (I'm not talking harlequin romances-- I'm talkin' severe smut. Where they use the word "fuck" out of narriation). She's not active. Her life is very seditary. My mother-- now that she has thinned quite a bit.. is active (When she's not in pain) and loves to be out doing something-- the same as I.

Basically, my mom and I are a lot alike.

My aunt Brenda came up for a visit this past May, and I loved it! My aunt Brenda borders on my favorite relative. She lives in San Antonio-- and she's fuckin' awesome. She is my dad's sister, but holds nothing against my mother for the divorce. She, like everyone else, wondered what the hell took her so long. I miss my Aunt when she isn't here. She's so cool.

I've been walking with my Grandpa when he goes for his walks. Lately, he hasn't been able to because of the heat. He had open heart surgery for a triple bypass and a valve, around 10 years ago, and is currently on warfarin and coumadin or whatever... so he's not to be out in the heat much. Again, I enjoy spending time with my grandpa. My uncle Steve usually goes with us. I enjoy spending time with the both of them--- when they aren't trying to save my soul. They know nothing of my religion. They only know I am not a christian, and apparently that's enough to make them try and "save" me.

My husband and I are doing well. We have sex more now.. heh heh. Nah, he finally came out of the closet about being a Nelson fan. I knew it buddy. They're so talented how can anyone not like them? He only gives me shit because I want to bang the hell out of both of them.. and he knows it!

I talk to Carla a lot anymore. Strange, I haven't ever met the woman, but honestly, she's become one of my better friends. Is this possible? She's so nice and understanding, but probably can't stand the fact I can talk her ear off. We seem to have a lot in common and have begun to wonder if we are related. I mean, my dad had several sexual encounters in his youth--- and did spend lots of time in florida... soooo... who knows? My family has heard so much about her, and I talk to her so much, it's like they already know her, and they do want to meet her. Especially my husband---maybe he has secret crush? eh? hehehe. Oh another thing we have in common is that we both seem to have the hots for the same guy. However, I am directing spellwork in her favor. I'd never trick her like that. Besides, she's the unmarried one. She needs this guy! But I think the "vibes" are going to the wrong guy.... err.. I need to practice more.

So.. I think I've piled in all needed detail... I don't know when my next update will be since I do not frequent the computer much at all.

Oh boy that was just a frightening experience! I had to fill my husbands prescriptions yesterday, from an ER visit 2 days ago... First part of the story will be the ER visit.

My husband is banned from doing the gardening. I'll take over again... he can mow the yard though, I suck on that riding mower... anyways... he apparently cut his leg on.. rusty nail(?), splinter(?).. don't know but a day later it was the size of a baseball and just squirting oozee....... oh yeah and he started "streaking." For those of you who do not know, when you get red streaks, it's the starts of septicemia.. AKA BLOOD POISONING... which can kill you. So we go off to the ER where he is seen by the most retarded sorry excuse for an MD ever.. Dr. Sidhu (yes I'm gonna say his name.. AVOID THIS MAN!). This is the same man who told me my son didn't have pneumonia (when he did and could've died), also the same man who when I was ten said "Yeah after reviewing the Xrays, her arm is broken."... Ok this sounds normal right... MY RADIUS (the R bone in my L wrist) was close to poking out of my skin!!! My wrist actually looked like an S if you turn it sideways... YA FUCKIN' THINK IT'S BROKEN?? Anyways... This man is an IDIOT.. so I was outside trying to call my mom, a nearly 30 yr registered nurse, the best IV sticker at the hospital.. etc.. to tell her that he was getting the starts of septicemia (the nurse in the ER confirmed our suspicions)... while I was outside Dr. Fuckin' Retard goes into the room to see my husband. I come back and he tells me that this dumbass doctor was in there for 3 minutes MAX, and all he said was "Yeah it's infected. You should protect yourself when gardening." this man didn't even LOOK at the poisonus spider bites on my husbands forearms... So that was it! But the nurse, who's a friend of mine did take a ... sample? of the ooze and sent it to lab.. now weither or not it gets analyzed... *shrug* Did I mention my husband's leg was throbbing? Yeah he could barely walk on it... so.. anyways.. The doctor orders a tetnus booster and a shot of rocephin.. ... that's it! Then the scripts to take home.. which I did ask for a pain pill for his leg (hey I get some too!).. well one was Augmentin (antibiotic).. the other I couldn't read.. neither could my mom.. so I figured maybe I'd be lucky and it'd be some mysterious pain reliever...

Onto part two. I dind't want to go into Marion yesterday, and had to be in Johnston City anyways (ran out of rolling tobacco)so I went to Bandy's (a locally owned pharmacy!I even know the guys son!)to drop off my husbands scripts... and I go .. inside and there's a guy.. he looks so familiar... who is that? He looks up at me and BAM oh my lord, it's a guy I knew in high school... a football player no less.. he sat in front of me in World History! So he recognizes me instantly, and it's a hey how are you doing, how ya been, what's goin on, wow great to see you conversation. So I drop off my stuff after letting him know i've never been there before.. he says.. "We're way behind today, so it's probably going to be around 30 minutes.".... That's way behind? Fuck I'm going there from now on! At our pharmacy in Marion it's always at least 30 minutes... anyways...

A dopey football player is now filling my husbands scripts... I'm praying the pharmacist DOES check... Ok so we get teh scripts back and I find out that he did get a pain pill.. know what it was...? NAPROXEN.. or.. Aleve.

Duh.. Thank God we've all got appts for wednesday... but my doc wont' refill my norcos yet... what an ass.

Oh I don't remember if I put this or not... but... Nelson will not be joining the Herrinfest concert listing... why, I don't know.. I don't know if the committee just refused to consider them.. but they've considered Nelson before... and honestly, after reading their list of DEMANDS to put on a show... I can kinda see why... Sorry boys, but this is southern illinois.. you're not getting some slippery nipple bark tea shit or whatever, or bottled water.. OR YOUR OWN LOO! You will use the porta-loo like everyone else...

But hey.. guess who's comin? Billy Currington and Firehouse!... See..? Billy Currington isn't too good to come here and plant his ass on a porta-loo. Fuck Billy I'm goin' to firehouse! YEAH!.. They should bring back Blue Oyster Cult.. that was awesome.. I left high as a kite and didn't even do any drugs.. god damn hippiees....

Especially when you get them together. Ok.. so is TV just that bad off that there isn't a God damned thing on except Law & Order all fuckin day ever damn day? They go completely insane with these friggin' shows... c'mon.. first it was just plain ol' law and order.. now they have Criminal Intent and Special Victims Unit... ok fuck you... it's the same with CSI! First just regular CSI in Las Vegas.. now New York, Miami... what the hell is the damned difference in these shows except the damn location?

Now Men on the other hand. Why are men even around? They're only good for one thing and you really think they'd be better at it! THey're so annoying!... a bit lazy too. But hey what am I bitchin' for?

My father came down today for the first time in like 3 weeks... and paid no attention to the kids. Should've known that his little "turn around" weeks ago was just to try and get my mom to take his ass back. A month ago, he really missed his grandchildren.. oh yeah and us, and wanted to come down all the damn time, visit the kids all the time, hell-- was even buying them toys and diapers... now... nada, zilch ... NOTHING. So... guess he didn't make a turn around after all.

So I started watching the Surreal life... I'm only waiting for Gunnar Nelson to pop on there in the next few seasons. Yeah he says he won't do a show like that..but didn't he say that about a show similar to CFC3?... Guess money talks eh? So now that he's $10,000 richer.. I wonder how many more friends he's acquired...? Still wondering if anybody has had the balls to tell him that now he's too fucking skinny and doesn't look nearly as good as he did before losing 30lbs. He's still desirable, but honestly I like to fuck men and not sticks... Yeah that was probably out of line, but look who you're talking to. I'm too damn honest... so If anyone ever wants an honest opinion.. ASK ME! I noticed his ex is in a new video called "Satisfied" by some really ugly country singer... hey at least she is doing a serious role and not a bimbo role like the last few videos I've seen her in...

Oh back to the surreal life.. isn't it awful when the best looking "woman" on the show is Alexis Arquette who is really a guy?..Sorry but that one little egotistical shit just isn't cute, and Tawny.. c'mon girl.. .. but then again.. My vision must be really bad because C.C. Deville is looking pretty damn good for his age...Basically I'd fuck ALMOST any man over the age of 35.. well maybe I should say 30.. here's a preliminary list..

1. Gunnar Nelson before the extreme weight loss.. ok ok I can't say I wouldn't NOW if given the ample opportunity.. (Hey NST members.. sue me ok? I'm not going to censor myself because it could offend someone.. I know it won't offend my one NST buddy.. but everyone else will probably shit bricks)
2. Matthew Nelson if he wasn't married.. like that's EVER stopped me before...
3. Big Kenny if he didn't act like he was on acid 24/7
4. Bret Michaels... the man will never be ugly!
5. C.C. Deville--- he looks good now that he's out of detox
---I've just noticed that all these men are blonde---
6. Shawn Michaels--- the wrestler that is..
7. The Undertaker--- c'mon 6'10"? Thats my kind of guy.
8. Peter Steele-- From Type O Negative-- but I've already seen him naked and have stolen the tattoo from his groin and put it on my leg! Still he's hottattttaatata.. Tall (6'6"), Black hair and PALE.. love it.


Now if I have to go onto the Under 30 men I'd fuck.. it'd be...
....... .... .... .....

1. Hayden Christensen-- if you don't know who this is.. go fuck yourself, then go geek out and watch Star Wars KAY?
2. Orlando Bloom-- as long as he kept the Legolas costume on...
3......um.... I can't think of anybody else!

Oh Hey back to Nelson.. NO they won't be at Herrinfest.. I'm gonna find out why, and on who's part it is as to why they won't be. I've seen their contract rider, and honestly.. after reading all the "must-haves" for a performance, you'd think they were Nelly and P. Diddy... But instead of the Nelson Twins.. I will get the pleasure of..

Firehouse
and Billy Currington..

Fuck Billy Currington I'm going to see Firehouse!

Wow I just got a letter from Jerry Costello (my congressman) about the mail I sent him about that bill that's going to go to vote about the damn pharmacists denying women birth control because they don't believe in it. That's bullshit. They shouldn't be allowed to say "No I won't fill this because I'm a self-righteous jackass, and I don't believe in birth control, and I'm going to push my beliefs on to you!".. get a new job then jerk off.. if you can't fill birth control.

Well last week we had a hell of a ride with the damn storms. One night after another we got pounded! They had an F3 rip through the counties right to the northwest of me, -- luckily we didn't really get too much. We did get some hail.. but no tornadoes! Apparently this tornado was on the ground for like 60 miles, because it killed 2 people in Missouri... this is straight out of a movie shit... these people were leaving their mobile home to get away from the tornado-- ok stupid thing number 1.. but then again you aren't supposed to stay in your mobile home--- and what happens? Their truck gets picked up and thrown into a propane tank and KABLOOEY!... Talk about straight out of hollywood. I oughta take a storm spotter class! I don't really need it, I can already spot pretty good.. I'm just not certified!

I also heard Tenessee got hit pretty good too.

But nothing really is going on... now it's fuckin' cold as hell when last week I was begging for AC.

Oh our Primary Elections are today. I get to go in and declare my damn party. Maybe now the friggin' republicans will stop asking me for money. I AM NOT A REPUBLICAN! I HATE YOU PEOPLE! YOU'RE WEIRD! So... stop asking for donations! Bush Sucks, Cheney Sucks, that one chick sucks, you all suck. BTW: South Dakota... YOU REALLY FUCKING SUCK. What the hell gives you the right to ban all abortions except in a life or death situation? Fuck you. So... if a father rapes his daughter and she gets pregnant... NO ABORTION?! Instead let the kid have a fucked up life and let it be born..with fifty gazillion types of defects, and suck the system dry because it will have to live off government funding... just so long as your holy-rollin, self-righteous ass doesn't let that poor girl get an abortion...

... Or I guess you could send the two to Alabama where that kind of thing is ok....

Well my father is finally gone. It's such a long ass story. But I'll give a run down.

2 days ago my mother went to file for an emergency order of protection. The next day.. Judge Ron Eckis.. the asshole who put my cousin away in prison, RELUCTANTLY gave it to her.. saying that she was just trying to get a leg up on a divorce (this guy also wasn't going to give one to a woman who's boyfriend, took her two kids for 48 hours w/o her permission, took the S.S. Cards and birth certificates-- he wasn't the father of her kids-- and did his taxes and got the earned income credit-- and the police wouldn't get involved even though she tried to file kidnapping charges---- I think that deserves an EOP)... So yeah this judge really has my vote for his next term.

That night the police never served it... but thats beside the point. She talked to my grandfather and my uncle, told them that she had divorce papers and all about the situation.. they called him, he came over to their house, they told him, dad called and blamed me, my sister, husband and the kids for the divorce, and they came down moved his stuff out and he signed them with flare. So he's gone!

We are all so much happier. Even the kids are happier. I don't know how the hell we put up with him for so long... ahhh....

Relief!

Well, Life has officially taken it's toll on me and I've went nuts. Not only is our Tax Return going to my husbands lame brain stupido daughter.. yeah like.. ALL of it and we were supposed to get 4500 back... but Timberline Fisheries has fired 8 people in the past week.. my husband one of them... for being 20 seconds late. I kid you not. This company has a hell of a lot of employee turn over, because mainly they fire if you aren't early, and that they treat their employees like shit, so much so that everybody quits. From every business I have ever worked for you have SEVEN minutes until you are considered late... but they fire if you aren't there like 1 second before you're supposed to clock in. I am going to be vindictive about this one. I'm writing an open letter to every newspaper to let them know about how Timberline treats their employees.

I am also going to be writing a letter to every damn congressman, including our Govenor, to tell them about how the child support system is incredibly fucked up. Why should MY KIDS earned income credit, go to some kid I could give a flying fuck about? I don't like this little girl. I'll never be a mother to her, let alone being a step-mother. When people ask me how many kids I have, I say TWO. I don't say THREE because she is NOT my kid. She has a mother, and just because my husband had her with his ex-wife, and I'm married to him-- does not make her any relation to me. It may sound bad, and rude, but I don't care. I told him before we married that I would never hold any responsibility for his daughter. I think though, if I married again, and some man was that way about my kids, I'd kick him in the balls... but I wouldn't marry anybody who had a problem with me having kids from a previous marriage... actually I wouldn't marry anybody again. However from what I understand, his ex-wife, shockingly, feels bad about this situation and offered to send some of the money back to us. You better bitch. It's not yours. IT's MY KIDS MONEY. THIS MONEY SHOULD BE SPENT ON THINGS FOR MY KIDS.

I think I'm starting to bond with Gunnar. My track record with bonding isn't good. It takes me too long to do. Oh yeah, I'm getting a tubal soon... and my husband is going to get his nutsack chopped off... well I wish. He's only getting a vasectomy. I get pregnant too easily. Four pregnancies, one miscarriage, one on the way, and ready to be adopted, EACH TIME I WAS ON BIRTH CONTROL... well some form of it.

So there, now you all know I am pregnant, but the child will be given up for adoption. I'm sorry. I can't handle another one... not only that, but Gunnar is already lacking a maternal bond that will be even less if we bring another kid into the house. THis kid may hate me for it... but hey... life sucks. Deal with it.

Gunnar Nelson has become way too skinny. I don't know what he was thinking losing so much damned weight. He was so so so hot before.. and now he's just... Well he's still hot (c'mon he's a Nelson.. Nelson's are all hot)... but... it's kinda... ick. I am not a fan of skinny boys. See Gunnar's starting weight was 175lbs and he was 5'10"... my husband .. who is not fat, ask my friend Carla, she's seen a picture, is only 5'7" and weighs around 185... my husband is actually pretty built. C'mon he can pick my fat ass up. I do know how much Gunnar weighs now, but I won't say... and it's disheartening. I would look disgusting if I weighed the same amount as he does now... and I'm 5'7".

I had a dream about my friend Steve last night. God, it was weird. I had a dream we were talking and he was getting ready to leave on some long ass trip, and I'd possibly never see him again, and he asked me if there was anything I needed to say/do before he left, and I said "Yeah" and just gave him this giant wet kiss.... semi-strange. What the hell does that mean? Yeah I admit I totally wanted to fuck him in High School, but that was nearly 5 years ago. I never did though. I wish I could've, but I was in a bad situtation, and the "boy" I was with at the time... that sorry son of a bitch, really made me think I wasn't worthy enough to talk to any other guy except him. Now I'm just scared of Steve.. I know he'd never hit me or try anything dumb, but it's because he's tall and blonde. See what happens to women who are messed with?

So far, I think this is all the news... I am currently looking for a job. Anybody want to hire me?

Wow, Gunnar if ya keep that up you're not going to win over anybody. Actually that was kind of rude to say that about your teammates... but I can't say nothin' about it. I'm a little more honest and rude...

I'm just not really getting this whole hate your mother thing. But I am starting to realize something... if I don't bond with my youngest.. I'll become a Gunnar Nelson story... sort of. I'm not blaming his mother for anything... but let me be rude here... and piss off everybody but hey you'll get over it.

He says... he gets the feeling she never really wanted him...

Ok... Maybe she didn't.... aaaaand she was forced to keep him...

Hey It happened to me God damn it. TWICE!... Now my husband is attempting it a third time... NO WAY. Will not happen again. My mother gene is non-existant.. kind of like Gunnar Nelson's mother. I am basically the younger incantation of his mother.. minus the alchohol.

Should this be a concern to me? I realize I'm seeing him at nearly 40 years of age still reeling on the fact that he felt unwanted blah blah blah and it seems to have had an effect... SO how come Matthew doesn't feel this way? If he does he certainly doesn't voice it.

Marriage counseling AGAIN tonight... I'll be looking for the pope...

I had a really funked (yeah FUNKED not fucked) up dream last night where I was having sex with Jeff Conway... and trying to keep it hidden from my husband.

Really strange.

Hey he wasn't bad in the dream ;).

I finally went to that marriage counseling last night. For the first time ever, I stepped foot into a Catholic church (I'm not Catholic and know NOBODY who is!). I was impressed! The Vatican really must have some serious cash reserves! This church was nice, not like oh look at the pretty stained glass window... it was like.. "Holy hell is this floor marble? Dude, that looks like gold...." Obviously this was the largest church I've ever steped foot in... we walked in the back way, and towards the congregation (?) room, and kept hearing echoing voices but saw nobody... Very big! Considering I couldn't find anybody... the dumb comment of the month came out of my mouth---

"Shouldn't there be a pope here or something?"

Hey I realized the error in that like thirty seconds after I said it.

Funny... our marriage counselor was a nun. But she wasn't dressed in Nun Gear, so I didn't laugh. She just told us she was a nun, and that she had heard everything blah blah. The priest was apparently in priest gear but I didn't notice.

I don't think much got accomplished, except for what was wrong with me, why I'm messed up, what upsets Garry about me, how I'm not the same, blah blah blah. So we have to go back NEXT week... Oh she also said my dad needs Lithium... hahahahah.

When I got home I started watching "War of the Worlds" for the second time, and for some reason it freaked me out! It didn't do that the first time I watched it.

Oh I also saw this interesting little program about if Vampires and Werewolves are real. Apparently, there are some people out there who think they are... I didn't get to see it all, but they had this guy on there who claimed to be a "lycanthrope"... and had a place of power among his clan of ... lycans? Oh and two people who claimed they were vampires, and that they drank blood and the whole nine yards. Even had nicely FILED teeth. Yeah, we know your teeth didn't come in that way. They did say that they don't bite smokers... because apparently our blood is too bitter, and tastes bad. So I'm safe from ever being bitten by a vampire... now I'll get my kids to start smoking at the age of 5... just so vampires won't bite them. This show even went so far as to say that "lycans" were possibly a bit stronger than vampires, because they're never off-guard... like vampires when they're asleep in the day or whatever. It was very interesting, and I think I'm going to look some stuff up on this subject. Apparently, there is this little ongoing battle in the "Underworld" between "Lycans" and Vampires.....

and I thought it was just a movie where Kate Beckinsdale's ass looked really hot.